So I made a few decisions…

…that a certain family member of mine will not like at all. Basically, he’s been acting like an asshole, and I’m tired of it. And you know, I’ve threatened with leaving before, but the finances weren’t there. What if I acted like the finances were there? Anyway, he’s made his bed, and he needs to lie in it.

My dad has never been all that comfortable with my transition, or around trans people in general. Back in September, he told my adopted sister Christina she still had masculine features. That earned him an exile from Gender SAFE the first time. One time, he outed me to one of his friends, and then failed to stick up for me when that friend suggested he move out because of me. In March, he called me a “b-tch without a c-nt,” a statement he hasn’t used since, but I know he’s thinking it. Lately, though, he’s been using “he/him” pronouns around me, and it’s left me tired and frustrated to the point where I can’t take any more of this shit.

It’s not only that. Lately, I’m finding banana peels and cheese wrappers by the computer. Empty stevia packets and cooking scraps like onion and garlic peels on the kitchen counter. An unwillingness to get and keep the place clean. Asking me to save money while demanding the steak and eggs at brunch. Expecting me to maintain civility while he prides himself on being a “right-wing name caller.” The list goes on.

So I decided to do a few things about it. I was hoping to save money for a breast augmentation, but I think getting away from him is top priority right now. I decided to find a better paying job first, then I can start saving money to absorb a rent payment, my car payment, and car insurance, on top of gas for the car, groceries, etc. I also know I need to work in peace for grad school, something that won’t be helped with him around. I’d like to keep my 3.85 GPA and improve on it, thank you so much!

But before I get away from him, I’m doing a few other things first. I can’t do much about cleaning the apartment right now due to my foot, but when I am cleared for physical activity again, I will devote as much time as I can to getting the place clean, and I mean clean. Then I plan on making him sign a contract promising to keep the place clean. If he doesn’t, then I have ways of getting him back, which will be disclosed later. Same thing with the car. Keep it clean or don’t use it!

I plan on setting aside some funds every week to make moving out possible. I can’t go with a house right now because I can’t afford it, but if I can get the funds to make a split rent with a trans sibling possible. One of my siblings is having trouble with her family too, so maybe she and I can work out an arrangement. I think she’d welcome it.

Right now, I see where my priorities need to be. Not only with work, school, and internship, but with where my money needs to be too. And if I can save enough to get out of a toxic environment, then I’ll feel much better.

By adventureswithambermarie

Just a 38 year old trans girl roaming around Holland, MI. My old life wasn't as glamorous as my webpage made it look. Transphobic comments will automatically be deleted and you will be blocked.

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